Church is seriously weird, isn’t it? I’m not a great fan of get-togethers anyway and I don’t like having to be nice to people on more days than a Sunday. I’m quite happy to go along, sing the hymns, read the bible and listen to the talk and pray the prayers, but then having to chat to people over coffee makes my head spin. It’s really hard having to pretend to be nice, You see, and acting the part of a Good Christian Woman for a whole hour plus coffee time is really more than enough for one week. I have to be extra bad on a Monday in order to make up for it. Your universe, after all, loves balance.
I think it’s the Sunday Lying that’s the last straw – it’s so very hard to avoid. Only last week, I found myself telling a member of the new church I’m going to that I hadn’t been able to sing the hymns properly (due to a sore throat) but I’d sung them anyway in my heart. Gross! I didn’t even recognise myself saying those words and thought I might laugh the moment I’d said them, but to my shame I did feel pleased that the woman looked quite impressed. But really! What could I be thinking??
And then only this week, I found myself reacting with enthusiasm to the minister’s suggestion that I consider officially joining the church now I was a regular attender, even though I hate joining churches, and I’m much better off sitting at the back and slipping away when the worship is done. So, God, if You could try to ensure that next time I go to church I don’t get swopped at the door on my way in with some kind of holy woman who gets me into all sorts of worthy activities I don’t need to be part of, that would be great. Thank you.